The mad ravings of His Excellency

Giles Ji Ungpakorn

Prachatai news website[1] has collected a sample of the mad ravings of His Excellency Generalissimo Prayut, Head Coupster and Almighty Ruler of Thailand. Here are some examples.

On the high price of seafood for the consumer: “If you can’t afford it eat something else and let rich people eat seafood. We don’t have to have equality. If you want to eat expensive food you have to work harder to earn the money.” His Excellency is explaining that most common citizens are just undeserving scum and need stay in their place. Meanwhile the hard-working generals continue to enjoy seafood and multiple fat salaries.

When lemons and limes became expensive: “Just grow your own in a pot and stop complaining. People have to learn to help themselves.” The Generalissimo is urging people to follow his example of helping himself to power and money.

Three wise thoughts on the problems of drought: “We’ve spent a lot of time destroying forests.” Obviously Our Dear Leader is talking about corrupt military officials and business friends who control the illegal logging racket….. “You need plant more trees and move down from the source of water in the mountains. If people leave the forest alone he (sic) will get bigger, but the problem is we don’t have water and nothing will grow.”

“We shall be getting Royal Rain to fall above the dams, but people should also dig wells”…. One wonders why HM King hasn’t solved the problem on a permanent basis.

Also on the problems of drought: “Farmers should try other things apart from rice and vegetables. People should farm grasshoppers to eat because they are high in protein. They should also farm earth worms for sale.”

During a speech to young Thais living in the U.S.A., who were visiting the home land, the General said that: “If farmers cannot grow rice they need to grow medicinal plants which yield a higher profit. However, our rice is still good. In the past we made mistakes because we did not understand the importance of making farmers stronger. His Majesty the King has graciously taught us that to make people stronger we need to teach people how to fish, not give the fish to them.” It is doubtful whether HM King or the wise General even know how to fish themselves…

On the problems of low prices for rubber: “It’s not as easy as people say to solve this problem. What I want people to do is to buy rubber mattresses. But if people insist of continuing to grow rubber, you’ll have to sell it on Mars.”

On the appalling rape and murder of British tourists on Ko Tao: “I ask you, if you wear a bikini in Thailand will you be safe? Only if you are not beautiful…” Meanwhile the junta is overseeing a gross miscarriage of justice by putting two innocent Burmese migrants on trial for this crime.

On the demand for an increase in the minimum wage to 360 baht per day, the Almighty Leader excelled himself: “I ask you; what is the total wage bill for the country? How much more money will we have to use? If we increase the minimum wage, do you want us to stop doing anything else? On every issue we must strengthen the framework so that we can raise the inner framework. It’s not just a case of raising the inner framework without considering other things. Is the country strong enough? Where will money be invested? … We’re all poor, don’t start agitating. We’re waiting for investment. The 300 baht minimum wage level was bad enough. It is a barrier to investment. Who introduced this level of minimum wage? I can’t agree to this. We don’t have the money.” …. But of course the Generalissimo does have the money for two very expensive submarines and other weapons for the boys… and also for hefty pay increases for the military.

On the “problem” of “motorcycle youth” the General once again consulted HM Pumipon: “They didn’t stick to the King’s Sufficiency Economy teachings”.

When people discuss the fact that there are economic problems: “Just don’t believe them.” …. Otherwise we shall have to haul you in for an Attitude Change?

And finally, to the media: “I wasn’t elected, so don’t criticise me. Your job is to raise (junta-approved) consciousness, not just to give facts.”

The question is why can this self-opinionated murdering megalomaniac get away with these embarrassing rants? Why must he claim to have an idiotic answer for everything? Why can he not speak Thai properly and string together a coherent sentence? The answer is that he is unaccountable to anyone because he holds power by the gun and is supported by fawning members of the middle-classes and the elites…. But ordinary folk are “too stupid” to deserve the right to vote?